This blogpost is by guest writer Lindsey Danis. Lindsey empowers LGBTQ travelers to understand and advocate for their needs and plan incredible adventures while feeling seen, heard, and supported. Lindsey is the author of (Out) On the Road: The Radical Joy of Queer Travel and founder of Queer Adventurers.
When I tell people I’m an LGBTQ+ travel writer, safety is the number one thing I’m asked about. I totally understand it: the world isn’t as safe as queer people, and places that were previously assumed to be LGBTQ-welcoming, including the United States and the United Kingdom, are becoming less friendly and less safe with each passing day.
Queer travelers want to know what’s safe, and I respect that. But in my opinion, staying safe as a queer travel is not something that’s 100 percent in our control.
Why? Well, for one thing it relies on other people. Homophobia and transphobia happen to queer people, by people who dislike or fear us and feel empowered to act in harmful and sometimes violent ways. This can happen in places with the worst laws—the kinds of places many queer travelers opt to avoid for safety reasons—and it can happen in places with all the right laws. Like the places queer travel listicles encourage us to go precisely because we’ll be safe.
I write more about the safety paradox in my guide to queer travel, (Out) On the Road: The Radical Joy of Queer Travel, a collection of my best travel safety and planning tips and empowering personal stories to help queer travelers explore the world on their own terms.
While writing my book, I spoke to dozens of queer travelers and travel industry professionals to hear their views on how LGBTQ+ travel can be not just safe, but rewarding and joyful. Keep reading for my top queer travel safety tips, adaptable for queer solo travelers, couple travelers and family travelers!
Queer Visibility and Travel Safety Tips
If you are visibly gender non-conforming, chances are that you will get extra scrutiny at some point during your trip. This is frustrating and unfair but by preparing for it you can remove the stress on the anxiety. My book has an entire chapter on how travel is different for folks who don’t fit in the gender boxes. Here’s an abbreviated version of the advice I give there:
1. Clothing & Personal Grooming
If you’re an AMAB person who likes to wear makeup, jewelry, or paint their nails that will attract extra attention. Likewise for AFAB people that don’t shave their body hair (I fall into this group). By dressing in ways that conform with typical gender norms (but do not cause you dysphoria), you can minimize the extra attention that you’ll get which can make you feel safer.
While blending or passing is a queer travel safety tip, in general I’m a big fan of traveling authentically in situations where it’s safe and comfortable to do that. You can absolutely keep the makeup or body hair, wear what makes you feel affirmed, and have a safe and joyful adventure. And if you get a few odd looks, so what? Maybe they’re jealous!
2. Airport Security and Travel Documentation
Know your rights around security screenings. For example in the US, TSA agents cannot require you to take off a binder or a prosthetic. If receiving a pat down you have the right to ask for a same-gender officer.
For trans folks who take hormones or wear prosthetics consider taking a doctor’s note with you explaining your situation. This can be discreetly handed to the TSA agent if you are questioned.
My number one tip around airport security is to join TSA PreCheck or Global Entry. In airports where it’s allowed (which is every US airport I’ve flown through), you get to bypass the invasive body scanners and go through simple metal detectors. No more confusing the software means no more invasive pat downs. I took this step years ago and it completely eliminated my airport anxiety!
3. Safe and Queer-Friendly Accommodations
Book a queer friendly hotel, so that you have a safe and welcoming place to decompress in at the end of a long day. This is a good idea anytime you travel but essential when you’re visiting somewhere it’s not safe to be openly queer.
In queer friendly countries, you can find LGBTQ-owned hotels. Staying here keeps your money circulating within the queer community!
In countries where it’s less accepted to be queer, it’s not as easy to find properties that are queer owned because advertising this could put the proprietors at risk. In these destinations, your best bet is to book with a major hotel chain that has a stated commitment of LGBTQ-inclusivity. These hotel chains are LGBTQ+ welcoming.
If you’d rather stay in a local hotel than a big chain, here’s how to check if it’s queer friendly. And finally – in case you need them – hotel safety tips to make your solo trip smoother.
Booking Hotels as a Same-Sex Couple
Traveling as a same-sex couple? Consider whether you’ll book a room with one bed or two – and expect that if you book a one-bedroom there’s a good chance that you’ll be offered to switch to a two bedroom when you check in!
That’s one of the more frustrating parts of traveling as a same-sex couple. I wish I could say that it’s getting better but I get asked this question a lot, even when I’m traveling to super accepting places like Honolulu.
If the destination is queer welcoming, my partner and I go for a king bed room. There are exceptions, like when countries have very small hotel rooms and we get a bigger room for the same price by booking two full beds. If the destination is more conservative, choosing two beds maintains your privacy. This is a super simple thing that you can do to protect your safety as a queer traveler!
4. Inclusive Tours and LGBTQ+ Travel Companies
I mostly plan my own trips, but if trip planning stresses you out there are tons of queer owned tour companies that you can book with.
The nice thing about these is that you don’t have to explain your safety needs, the tour organizers understand – and they take care of all the details, so you can relax and have fun. There are tons of gay tour companies and a growing number of lesbian tour companies; it takes a bit more digging to find non-binary and trans inclusive companies.
General tour companies that are very inclusive include Unruly Travel, Contiki and G Adventures. I’m actually taking my first G Adventures trip later this year and was impressed to see they include information for LGBTQ+ travelers in the welcome email.
Group tours tend to be more expensive, but they provide a sense of “safety in numbers.” If you’re visiting somewhere with bad laws, like I’m doing, it can be worth it to pay extra for peace of mind – and not having to stress over queer travel planning.
5. Identifying Queer Spaces and Community
Before your trip, look up queer things to do and places to go. Not only do you get to explore the local queer community, which is always fun, but if you’re passing for straight or blending it, letting your guard down in queer safe spaces is good for your mental health. Having to hide all the time is depressing and stressful.
It used to be that you’d look up LGBTQ+ things to do and find only gay nightlife. Fortunately, it’s getting easier to find sapphic and trans inclusive spaces! Check Instagram as well as Google and LGBTQ+ travel blogs. Queer dating apps such as HER or Grindr are another great way to connect with locals, even if you’re partnered. These apps are generally safe to use in countries that don’t criminalize homosexuality.
However, in countries where it isn’t safe to be queer apps like these have been used to target local queer people. From a safety perspective it’s best to avoid them or only access them using a VPN.
Always verify anything you find in an old travel blog because spaces tend to shift and change rapidly. I learned this the hard way while going out of my way to check out a queer club in Dresden only to find that it had closed down!
6. Respect Cultural Norms and Local Laws
I believe that you should always learn about the cultural norms of a place that you’re visiting and do your best to respect them. For queer travelers, there is a safety element of this as well.
Different places have different norms around everything from gender identity and expression to public displays of affection. For example, lots of countries have taboos on kissing in public, so think twice before you take a queer travel makeout selfie.
If you’re openly affectionate at home it can feel weird to suddenly avoid touching your partner. But if you violate the cultural norms then you’re going to attract attention that you don’t want. You could even get fined or kicked out of the country for behaviors that you wouldn’t think twice about doing at home.
It helps me to remind myself that these behaviors are off limits for everyone, not just queer people. This way I don’t feel like I’m being unfairly penalized.
7. Protect Your Digital Privacy
If you’re visiting a country where it’s not safe to be openly queer, then don’t post queer travel content while you’re there! Some travel bloggers learned this lesson the hard way when they were detained at the airport and interrogated by security officials. They were eventually let go with a warning never to come back.
You can always set your social media accounts to private, even just temporarily. Or you can do what I did and delete the apps from your phone, then reinstall them after your trip!
If the idea of getting in trouble for what’s on your phone or in your apps makes you nervous, check out my guide to reducing your digital footprint during travel. It covers easy, medium, and time-consuming ways to safeguard your data and privacy and whenever you travel, something that unfortunately queer travelers have to think about these days.
8. Stay Aware and Trust Your Instincts
Pay close attention when you first arrive in a new city. Always be aware of your surroundings when you leave your hostel, hotel or vacation rental.
Learn how to get around without relying on your phone by identifying landmarks and street names. Observe who’s around and at what times of day. This way you’ll be able to tell if something seems off and you can trust your gut.
If you’re heading back to your accommodation and you feel like you’re being followed, or something feels off, take protective action. Pull out your phone and call a friend (or even just pretend to make a call). Say that you’re heading back to your hotel and you’ll call them when you get to the room. Another smart idea is to walk into a restaurant or bar and wait for the person to leave, or use that time to call a taxi or rideshare.
More LGBTQ+ Tavel Resources
Traveling while queer can come with extra layers of planning and paying attention. Some of this happens before your trip, some of it requires your on-the-ground attention throughout your stay. It’s not fair that queer travelers need to take responsibility for our own safety.
Ideally, the world would be safe and accepting for us. But when you take ownership of your safety as a queer traveler, you are the first step toward shaking off the fear that keeps too many queer people from traveling confidently. Thinking through everything ahead of time frees up mental space, so you can be present to the adventure. And if you want more tools like this, my book is packed with action steps, checklists, and strategies that you can use to enjoy off-the-beaten-path adventures without hiding who you are.